Well again I write to you with thoughts of loneliness. Bored out of my mind and the only thing I really want to do it pop a few pills and go to bed. For real, but on the side note I just finished watching the matrix movie. That is number two and there was some stuff i never really paid close attention to in there and it made me think. There was a quote from the movie about choice and understanding. Pretty interesting stuff if you have seen the movie. Not to far fetch but you get my drift. And I quote "We can never see past the choices we don't understand", and "I have already made the choice" Now I have to understand it.

Now I have to understand it? Whoa! And I have already made the choice and now I have to understand it... Well isn't that true for everyone. The choices we make and the fact that we can never see pas the choice we don't understand. I believe it, well I do ya know. Who cares is probably what you are thinking and that okay. People you maybe know may seem like they care but really don't, or maybe they do care and are just waiting to see if you would mess up again. I have come to a point in which my understanding is really messed up. If I would really let me heart be expose on paper internet you probably would be pissed or not want to talk to me. You would probably think to yourself I should pray for this young man. I ask myself awhile back when have I seen my prayers being answered? Again I go back to the heading of my page, Waiting. Why wait you might say. Well, because I am waiting for something real.